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Fake pope hands
I'm sorry, but that video of the pope is the most SNL thing I have seen this year. I'm 100% sure there is an able-bodied person behind the pope. Whose arms are actually the ones moving around. This is like Weekend at Bernie's. SNL, all these things combined. Those are not his hands. That's my conspiracy wiggle wiggle, pop, pop.

Mystic River
So, long story short the week before Mystic River came out, I was working at a Blockbuster Video. And somebody went behind the counter and grabbed a copy of it. And I was working the floor just, you know, straightening everything. So they came to the front desk. They checked it out, stupid me, not paying attention. I thought it was missing Pizza. And they uh, got me fired. All because of uh Stupid Sean Penn movie. But guess what? I'm still alive Blockbuster. Is it so take that haha.

Stuck in space
so, if you're stuck in space, there's no way to like Fart burp. Blow your way out of that situation. I don't know. I'd figured they'd have like a some kind of pocket propellant and then For those exact situations so that they're not stuck. But I feel like I can let 1 good 1 rip and I could definitely float my way out of there.


the day the 23andMe keeps is minuscule compared to your actual DNA

Enough with the puns
Hey, junkies. Um, you guys were talking about like puns, you talk about this. Actually regularly about the fact that, you know, news stations use the same cheesy puns and yada yada well corporations do that, too. Um, I'm waiting for some medication from, uh, delivery pet Med service. And um, there's been some issues kind of going back and forth and so I emailed them and I got this response. We hope you're having a wagtastic day. We appreciate the update and we'll keep our ears. Perked and head tilted. As we eagerly await your mail, have a tail thumping day. Um, it's just cheesy, like this is really work on anyone. Does this make anyone laugh? Anyways, you guys have a great day. Uh,


Not the way a bomb works shawn...
Hey guys. I hope you guys are doing well, so Sean, I don't think, you know how a bomb works. If you drop a bomb, you basically kill everybody, but if you get somebody's DNA and you let's say release a nerve agent of some kind that only affects them, then it's specifically will just affect them. Yeah. That's the way that kind of works. Thanks. Bye.


What's going on news junkies? Hey uh the kid dying over in Costa Rica. You never know. They could have tried some weird dish like puffer fish or something that may not have been cleaned properly or some other type of seafood that has toxins or possibly a a local, you know, fruit or vegetable. Um, that might have caused an allergic reaction. I mean you never really know especially when you're in a different country. Anyways, you guys have a great day wiggle, wiggle, pop, pop,

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